“I dare not compare with the achievements of the seniors,” Zhuang Yiyun said. “In our field, as we age, the richness of knowledge, accumulation of experience, and tempering of character are crucial for advancing research.”
“That’s why we need complementary expertise, Dr. Zhuang. The National Pharmaceutical Center sincerely invites you, the country needs you. If you have any doubts, feel free to express them. We can discuss any requests,” Director Zheng said earnestly. Zhuang Yiyun was not from his pharmaceutical company and couldn’t be directly assigned to work. If he persisted in refusing, it would be very troublesome.
“Once it spreads, no one can stay indifferent.”
Zhuang Yiyun could no longer refuse. In fact, when Director Zheng mentioned the possibility it was created artificially, he was already shaken. Such matters were never a subject for jokes. He wasn’t someone with a strong sense of morality, but national justice couldn’t be ignored. He couldn’t let Yan Yan be in danger.
“I do have concerns. First, it’s about the opinions of Senlan. I joined the research and development team of Senlan as a researcher. Medical treatment can’t rely solely on emotional cards. Whether it’s a vaccine or a specific drug, both will require production lines in the future. Can my personal contributions be tilted in favor of Senlan?” Zhuang Yiyun asked.
Director Zheng had already considered this before coming. He had to take a core technical personnel from Senlan, so he couldn’t come empty-handed. He nodded immediately.
Ke Mingcheng was surprised. He hadn’t expected Zhuang Yiyun to bring up this exchange. This was something he should have considered. Regardless of whether he resisted the pressure from the corporation to send Zhuang Yiyun or convinced the corporation to profit from it, Zhuang Yiyun’s approval wasn’t needed.
Ke Mingcheng said, “I can’t ask too many questions about classified matters. But Senlan has a strong research and development capability and a large team of experts. Our laboratory equipment and production lines are first-class. If collaboration partners are needed, I hope Senlan can enter your view. Not just our Dr. Zhuang, we can also mobilize personnel to form teams for joint development. Funding and equipment investments can all be discussed.”
Director Zheng nodded, “The current security clearance doesn’t allow it but we can communicate further later. Senlan’s strength is widely recognized.”
Zhuang Yiyun continued, “Secondly, I want to know where the project is located.”
“The National Pharmaceutical Center’s research base is in Inner Mongolia, it’s somewhat remote.”
Zhuang Yiyun’s frowned slightly. Inner Mongolia was really far from Xing City, around two thousand kilometers. Before he could voice his agreement, he began to worry about Yan Yan. He already felt a pain in his heart.
“Is the base under closed management? Are family visits allowed?”
“They are allowed after the political review, but there are restrictions on the frequency.”
“The monitoring level is higher than outside. The security system automatically locks and intercepts keywords. As long as research-related information isn’t leaked, there are no restrictions.”
Zhuang Yiyun was glad he could at least bring his husband… he wished he didn’t come to work today! Just a regular day at work, a common visit to Ke Ming’s office turned into this.
Zhuang Yiyun didn’t work overtime that day. He went to pick up Yan Yan from school early. When he entered the school gate, he saw many graduates in bachelor’s gowns taking pictures in groups and almost drove onto the pedestrian path…he will not be able to participate in the delayed graduation ceremony…
When Yan Yan came out of the library, he saw Zhuang Yiyun standing by the pathway under the library building. The sun had set, and the night had shrouded the world in darkness. The flickering light from Zhuang Yiyun’s fingertips was quite conspicuous.
They rarely smoked so Yan Yan quickly walked over.
The lighter enclosed Zhuang Yiyun’s face. He lowered his eyes, his eyes cold, as if in deep thought. He didn’t even notice Yan Yan coming over.
Zhuang Yiyun snapped back to reality. He was about to put out the cigarette when Yan Yan grabbed his hand. He took a drag before snuffing out the cigarette.
“What’s wrong?”
“Can we talk at home… in private?”
“Of course.”
Zhuang Yiyun was silent throughout the journey. Yan had never seen him like this and he sensed it wasn’t a minor issue. He didn’t rush to ask, fearing it might affect driving safety. It was only when they entered the house and sat on the couch that he finally asked.
Zhuang Yiyun had mentally prepared himself during the entire trip, but even so, expressing it still felt difficult.
“I need to go to Inner Mongolia. The specific location is still unclear.”
“Why isn’t it clear?” Yan Yan paused and asked, “How long will you be gone?”
“It’s estimated to be… three years.”
“Zhuang Yiyun, this is a joke, right?”
“I’m not joking. The National Pharmaceutical Center has an important project, and they had to call me in. They came to talk to me about it today, and I agreed. I’ll produce results as soon as possible and come back early, Yan Yan…”
Yan Yan interrupted him: “You agreed? Don’t you think you need to discuss such a significant matter with me? Zhuang Yiyun, your career is your own, but we… aren’t we a couple?”
“This matter is classified. I can’t disclose project details to you. I should go, and I must go.”
“Three years? Are you kidding me? What if I cheat on you?”
“You dare!” Zhuang Yiyun subconsciously grabbed Yan Yan’s arm.
Yan Yan shook his arm free, stood up, and pointed at Zhuang Yiyun angrily, “Bastard, you think I don’t dare! You can just decide to leave so easily, why should I wait for you and endure all this suffering? If we separate, even if I sue for divorce, I won’t be blamed.”
Zhuang Yiyun was so agitated by his words that his eyes turned red. He stood up and pulled Yan Yan into his arms, holding him tightly, not letting go no matter how he struggled.
“Yanyan, Yan… Please don’t provoke me on purpose, I beg you.” His voice was unusually vulnerable, merging strangely with his forceful embrace. “I beg you to wait for me, wait for my return.”
Yan Yan’s eyes also turned red. He raised his head stubbornly, refusing to relent. He had worked so hard to prepare for the law school entrance exam. Now, Zhuang Yiyun said he was leaving. He was acting like a scumbag, leaving but insisting he wait for him. Why was he so domineering and selfish?
But he didn’t really want to leave Zhuang Yiyun. He was just too reluctant, unwilling to part. Thinking about not seeing him in the days to come, he couldn’t control his tears, and they streamed down instantly.
Yan Yan cried in his embrace, breaking Zhuang Yiyun’s heart.
“I’m sorry, baby. I’m so sorry,” Zhuang Yiyun apologized by his ear, kissing away his tears bit by bit.
“Can’t you stay?!” Yan Yan was still teary-eyed, and his voice sounded broken. He asked after their argument, seeking confirmation with a pleading tone.
Zhuang Yiyun was heartbroken, wishing he could call Director Zheng right now and say he wouldn’t go. He cradled Yan Yan’s face and kissed him, then rested his forehead against Yan Yan’s to calm down. He shook his head slowly.
“Gege…then when will you leave then?”
“Tomorrow.”
Yan Yan bit down on Zhuang Yiyun’s arm, drawing blood even through the fabric. In the long silence, Zhuang Yiyun allowed him to bite. Yan Yan’s tears dripped onto the wound, making it sting. But he knew that this pain was nothing compared to Yan Yan’s heartache at this moment.
“Gege, let’s do it.”
That night, Yan Yan was unusually proactive. When it ended, it was already dawn. They hadn’t even had dinner and were now too hungry. Zhuang Yiyun went to cook noodles and Yan Yan ate in silence. He couldn’t even complain about Zhuang’s cooking.
After eating, Zhuang Yiyun went to wash the dishes. Yan Yan said behind him, “I won’t wait for you. If I get bored, I’ll go out and have fun. If I fall for someone else, I’ll leave. Today marks the end of our relationship.”
Zhuang Yiyun’s movements paused. He put the bowl in the sink, turned around, and pressed Yan Yan against the dining table.
“Then remember tonight. See who else can feed you in the future.”
The night before their separation was destined to be sleepless.
The next day, when Zhuang Yiyun left, Yan Yan was still asleep. He didn’t want to make him laugh anymore, so he didn’t wake him up. He gently kissed Yan Yan’s forehead and left quietly.
The National Pharmaceutical Center arranged for staff to wait for him downstairs and accompany him to the airport. He remained silent throughout, his expression frighteningly cold. In his mind, all he could see were Yan Yan’s eyes that were red from crying yesterday. Yan Yan had always been so lively, cool, and aloof. Zhuang Yiyun had never imagined that he would cry like that one day. He wanted to make him happy, but he ended up being the one making him cry.
Yan Yan was actually awake when Zhuang Yiyun kissed him, but he pretended to be asleep. He buried his head in the pillow for a while, then gently lifted the blanket, rolled over to Zhuang Yiyun’s side, and buried his head back in the pillow. Zhuang Yiyun’s pillow carried his scent, giving him the illusion that he was still by his side.
Yan Yan’s phone vibrated with a new message notification. He fumbled for it for a while before grabbing it.
Zhuang Yiyun: [I won’t be able to attend your undergraduate graduation ceremony. I’ll definitely be back before the postgraduate graduation ceremony. Wait for me.]
Yan Yan stared at the message for a good three minutes, then abruptly threw off the blanket and got up. With his movements, the intertwining marks and fingerprints on his skin were revealed. His legs were a little weak, but he managed to stand. He grabbed a T-shirt and quickly changed, then washed up briefly before heading downstairs and took a taxi to the airport.
Under the National Pharmaceutical Center’s arrangement, Zhuang Yiyun went through a special security channel. After Yan Yan arrived at the airport, he searched for him at the regular security checkpoint but found nothing. He had thought about seeing him off but arrived late. Helplessly, he turned around, feeling empty inside, and walked back.
Zhuang Yiyun didn’t know he had come. If he knew, would he appear? Yan Yan felt they hadn’t said a proper goodbye. He said it was a classified project, but would he be able to return after three years…or maybe it was longer?
With these thoughts, Yan Yan couldn’t hold back anymore. All his grievances, all his anger, all the pain of separation was pushed aside. He took out his phone and sent a message to Zhuang Yiyun.
Yan Yan: [I’m at the security checkpoint.]
Yan Yan: [I’ll give you ten minutes.]
Zhuang Yiyun’s call came immediately. Yan Yan answered, and the first thing he heard was a stranger’s shout, “Dr. Zhuang, where are you going? The boarding will start soon. Where are you going?”
There were running footsteps, and Zhuang Yiyun said, “Wait for me.”
Yan Yan’s heart raced. He listened to the sounds on the phone until Zhuang Yiyun appeared in front of him and suddenly pulled him into his arms, holding him tightly and leaving no gap.
The staff member who had chased after him was a step behind, panting heavily and stopping not far from them. He propped his hands on his knees and wanted to say something. But on seeing this scene, he instantly fell silent. He had been in the project team with Dr. Zhuang before and had heard the researchers at Senlan talking about how affectionate Dr. Zhuang and his lover were.
In order to respond to the nation’s call, he had put down the project he was working on, which was close to success, and could only hand the fruits of his labor over to someone else. In addition, he was forced to separate from his beloved partner…they were just saying goodbye, he should just keep quiet.
“Yanyan…”
Yan Yan hugged him tightly.
“Come back early. Remember what you said. You’ll come back in time for my post-graduation ceremony. I can only take the specialized exam, so I’ll graduate in three years. If you break your promise, I won’t want you anymore.”
Zhuang Yiyun: “But you don’t want to let go.”
“Get lost, Zhuang Yiyun.”
“Being fierce won’t help. You won’t let go of your husband. Family members are allowed one visit per year. I’ll wait for you to come and see me.”
“I won’t go.”
“They say as long as the phone doesn’t leak secrets, there are no restrictions. I’ll send you messages whenever I have time. If I don’t reply promptly, don’t be angry. The country is taking care of your husband. He must be busy and won’t go messing around.”
“You’re not allowed to cry…I love you, Yan Yan.”
His words had a similar effect to a petrifying spell. Yan Yan, who had been defiant, immediately softened. It was the first time Zhuang Yiyun had said those three words.
He wanted to respond, but the words seemed to be stuck, as if something was blocking him. The airport started announcing boarding calls and he heard Zhuang Yiyun’s name. He nodded towards the boarding gate, and pushed Zhuang Yiyun, urging him to board.
He had wanted to be a bit more aloof during their parting, preferably turning around at the same moment Zhuang Yiyun did, walking away confidently in the opposite direction. But in the end, he stood there until he couldn’t see Zhuang Yiyun anymore. Only then did he wave in the direction where Zhuang Yiyun had disappeared. Because he didn’t know which plane Zhuang Yiyun was on, he stayed in the terminal and watched over ten planes take off before leaving.
🥺🥺🥺